I haven't been writing lately.
Oh, I've been blogging...but for the most part I don't feel like I've been writing. Not the creative, lay your feelings on the line kind of writing. Nothing has pushed it's way to the front of my brain for a long time. At least nothing screaming "Write me! Write me!"
It's silly, really it is. I feel sort of lost without this passion. I love to write and the fact that I haven't felt like it lately has contributed a large part to the funk that I've been feeling. It's not the sort of thing you can force yourself to do. Well, I can't anyway. I want it to come back. Or maybe I just want it to come back so I can feel like I'm on the upswing of whatever this cloud is.
Starting next week I'm back to working 3 days a week for a few hours. Maybe something to fill my days will help my brain get back on track. Maybe... I don't know.
Life without passion is very dull indeed. I suppose I should be thankful for these mundane, boring times in my life. But in the end I want to find my way back to a me that I used to be. Then again, is that a good thing to wish for? Should I be trying to work forward and create some new version of me instead of trying to put pieces back together to create an old me - a me that I was comfortbable with and understood.
It's all so frustrating! Being the patient person that I am (NOT!) I'm just going to have to ride this out and see where I end up.
About Me
- Kelly
- I'm a single mom trying to make sense of it all. I recently went back to college full time. I am a math major, and eventually I will teach at a secondary level. I have two great kids! My son, Joshua died from a brain tumor when he was 5 years old, and my daughter is now in 9th grade.
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5 comments:
It's always best, at least in our experience, to go with the flow. Good luck to you, Kelly.
i know exactly what you are talking about. i just haven't been able to get my butt in gear and write someone meaningful.
xox ♥
I fully empathize with that feeling of "no inspiration". It is frustrating, but hopefully not something that will last a long time. I think sometimes we just find ourselves in a rut.
Hang in there.I find my "muse" returns when something happens to reallllllly p*** me off, and then it's back to business as usual.
Jimmy
I ran my muse over with a truck. It takes some time to find a new one :)
Charley
http://journals.aol.com/cdittric77/courage
Dang woman you just wrote exactly how I've been feeling. There's just nothing there right now to write. I feel like every time I write, it's the same thing....about Chad coming home. Our days are good, but I just am not in the mood to write about the day to day cleaning, the daily school work, the playing with blocks, etc. I know it works for some, but it just doesn't feel right when I start to write about it. My last couple of posts I've wrote about laundry. LAUNDRY! I HATE laundry and yet that's what I wrote about! Speaking of it though...I have to get up and get to putting it all away!
I hope you'll have some fun stories to share once you're back to work!
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