What I didn't do

I didn't do the homework I should have done today (as usual, there is always tomorrow *sigh*)

What DID I do today?

I went to see a movie with my dad.

Facing the Giants

All I can say is WOW.

I've seen the reviews, heard it was a low budget movie, where the preaching didn't come through as "preachy" or rehearsed as most low budget "God movies".

I wasn't prepared for how relevant the movie was...at least for me.

I've said it before, but it seems that saying it out loud enough times isn't helping me get the point. I have become lazy in my faith. So lazy. I am failing my daughter in this respect and my parents are getting down right rude about it (which of course just makes me stay away from church all the more, 'cause you know, I'm acting like a child!)

Anyway, the movie...

Basically it was the story of a coach at a Christian High School in Georgia and his struggle with an average football team. Since they have nothing to lose, they decide to turn their team over to God and praise Him in losing - and if it is His will - winning. With his young wife, there are financial struggles, a car that never starts, a stove that stops working...and unforseen medical expenses when they start to investigate infertility problems.

OK, that's not the best synopsis ever, but you get the point.

I won't ruin the story for you, but let me say what caught my breath was the way that God answered some of the prayers of the characters in this story. Having watched my child die, I guess I am used to being on the "losing" end of the prayer thing. Which isn't to say that I haven't seen Him perform miracles in the lives of other children with cancer. And these miracles did not always go to God-fearing families who were spending hours on their knees. It is enough for me to know that His way is higher than mine, and that I need not know why He does what He does. But, it's also easy to forget that there are miracles out there. There are so many challenges in my life that I forget to give over ownership of all the crap. It's easier to hold onto it, easier to do it all myself. But His glory will not thrive in my life is I continue to close off rooms in my heart.

The story that they told in the film went something like this "Two farmers were watching their crops die because it had not rained. Both prayed for rain. But only one farmer was preparing his fields for the rain, while the other continued to pray. Which one do you think really believed that God could send the rain?"

And which kind of farmer do I want to be? Am I preparing my life to bloom where it is planted? Not most days. Most days I am trying desperately to dig my life up and plant it someplace else. Someplace better. Someplace with fewer challenges. Someplace easier.

Did Job replant himself when God allowed his trials to descend upon him? I think not! (and lets face it, I'm definately no Job)

And then the movie ended with one of my favorite Casting Crowns songs

"Voice of Truth"

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand

..........

So I guess I'm going to resolve to let Him take my hand, because I cannot (CANNOT) do this myself.