Merry Christmas!

I do hate it when life gets in the way of my computer time.

The good news - I got a B! I'm so excited! Still hung over with exhaustion from all the work, and not quite sure how I pulled it off - but I'll take a B. The bad news, I have to take her again next year! OY! I'm not lookin' forward to that!

But, winter break has been good. I am working a lot of hours (well, a lot for me anyway). Princess had her last day of school last Tue and is off until the 3rd. I'm not sure about the rest of the country, but most of the school around here went right up through last Friday and have off until the 8th. It was nice having her home for a few days during the last minute Christmas rush. I had last Thursday off so we did out last minute shopping together.

We had a wonderful Christmas. Even though mom only lives a mile away, it's our tradition to sleep over at her house and open presents there in the morning. This works out well for me because I am such a Grinch! I used to love decorating for the holidays but the last few years I just have NO desire to do it. I didn't even put the tree up this year - now that's bad! Princess got a gift certificate to Build-a-Bear from Grandpa and one to Claire's from my brother. Guess there's a trip to the mall in my future this week (*ew*).

I've been gone so long it seems like I should have so much more to say.

Dad & I tried to go see Rocky on Sat morning, but the theater was too busy for our taste. We did see The Nativity Story a couple weeks ago. THAT was a great movie! I can't tell you how many times I cried. I felt like I was really getting a glimpse of what Mary & Joseph went through. I'm sure we can only imagine the hardships that they faced in that time and place. I loved how they portrayed the Wise Men. I know once it comes out on DVD Princess & I will have a few laughs over those Wise Men!

Santa brought me a Palm Pilot, which is just what I asked for. I also got jammies and gift certificates for the car was. Princess got the coolest new toy that I could find it's a Disney Mix Max You can use it like an MP3 player and listen to music or you can buy little cards (like the size of the memory card for your camera) that have movies on them! She's in love - it's so very pink. She also got a Tamagotchi from Grandma. Now there is one annoying toy. But, it seems that all the girls at school have one and modern technology allows you to connect to other tamagotchi's and play games. So, you see, she just HAD to have one! If that thing beeps at me one more time it's going to get hit with a hammer *evil chuckle*.

My schedule next semester is ugly again. Since I dropped 3 classes last semester I have to make them up this time around. Of course 2 of the ones that I need to take are both offered at 10 MWF. Figures. And there are only 2 sections of each class and the other sections of both totally throw off my schedule! For the most part it's not too bad. I am in class MWF from 9-noon and then I can work Tue & Thur. But then I have to be back in class T & Th from 4-5:15. I guess it's not as bad as this semester being in class from 5-7 was crappy! The 3rd class that I dropped is looking hopeless. It's not offered at a decent time at the community college next semester OR this summer. My only hope is that when the summer schedule comes out for the University that it will be offered.

I have to go out this week and get my Statistics book. YUCK! I cannot tell you how much I am not looking forward to taking Statistics.

Since it's Christmas, I shouldn't end this post by complaining!

Merry Christmas to all of you. May God bless you and shower you with the gentle peace that you can only find in Him.

The greatest of these...

So, the sermon yesterday was incredible. It was a topic that was near and dear to my heart. Mostly because it is one I struggle with.

The pastor was reflecting on a couple of verses in Matthew. Specifically Matthew 22:37-39, which says "...'YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND. This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, 'YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.'"

I've been reflecting on my own favorite question, "can the world tell what I believe or that I believe or ANYTHING about me by the way I act?" or maybe "what does the world think of me based on the way I act?" I'm not sure which answer is scarier. And I guess my favorite local D.J. must have been wondering the same thing lately because every morning last week the banter between songs seemed to include little messages like "the stores are crowded today so if you're heading out remember that you are a child of God and your actions should reflect that".

Which got me to thinking about all the opportunities that I miss out on to simply be nice. Oh, now, don't get me wrong. I'm basically a nice person. I'm the mom the teacher calls when she needs something. I'm the one who brings snacks to college when we're overloaded with homework and I can tell everybody needs a break. I don't let traffic get to me (not like there's a TON of traffic in West Michigan).

Anyway, so back to the sermon. I was listening as the pastor talked about how once we loved people (and I mean REALLY love people) the rest of the commandments fall into line. And that totally makes sense. But, it's not as easy as it sounds. Is it?

And then he pulled out the kicker. He quoted from an article written by a self-professed atheist - an article which extolled the virtues of charity. Yup, charity. The article speaks to the aftermath of Hurrican Katrina. It's from 2005, but as I search the internet I find references to the tens of thousands of volunteers who have travelled to the gulf coast. I know churches from West Michigan are still sending relief teams to lend a hand. All this as 2006 draws to an end.

So, if you're looking for proof that simply loving your neighbor can make a difference, I encourage you to go and read the article. See for yourself how love shines above all other things.

Article -

Faith Does Breed Charity

Silence is Golden

So...

the presentation was not great. It was OK, just not great. Some of them were REALLY (and I mean REALLY) good. Ours was just OK. But, it's over and done with and the content was there, so I think our grade will be decent.

Friday night I took Princess to see the Cheetah Girls. It was 2 1/2 hours away, and as luck would have it. She got sick on the way down. Joy. Her friend (and her friend's mom) were really great and didn't complain about our couple delays. It did end up working perfectly. We walked into the venue just as the warm up act was singing. So, we didn't miss any of Vanessa Anne Hudgins or Cheetah Girls. Our seats were good, the venue was a performance hall, not an arena, so there wasn't really a bad seat in the house, but ours was the last row before an aisle so we could step over the back of our seats to get out. And let me just tell you we NEEDED to get out! The place was not air conditioned (can you even imagine!). So, 4,000+ people in a hot room with a sick 9 year old. It was a lovely evening. We were seated near the main entrance so when we stepped out to the lobby there was lots of fresh air from the freezing outside. That seemed to make her feel a little better and we could hear the music from out there. She did make it through most of the concert, and maybe the last 1/4th we were out of the theater. She kept peaking in just to see what they were wearing. For the amount of times they changed their clothes they could have sang six more songs - ROFL. I was amazed at how many WHOLE families were there. I figured there would be lots of "one mom with a couple of girls" kind of thing, especially considering the price of the tickets. There were even a few poor brothers in the lot who you can tell were DRAGGED kicking and screaming! Poor kids. But anyway, Princess fell asleep quickly on the ride home so at least that was peaceful.

And then she was sick all weekend. But the fun doesn't end there. Her great-grandma (her dad's grandma) died on Saturday. So, he picked her up tonight to take her to the funeral (an hour away) tomorrow. Of course, she came home sick from school today - so good luck to him with that one. Hopefully by morning she'll feel better. HOPEFULLY

Did I mention her dad picked her up? This means I am sitting in an empty (quiet) house. Avoiding writing yet another paper. Eating Oreo's (no NOT double stuff - EW). Drinking Pepsi. Watching some stupid show on TV.

It's heaven.

Yikes!

I have a huge presentation tonight. It's worth a fifth of my grade, and while I'm not usually nervous about these presentations - this one is a group thing and the two people that I am working with are so much smarter than me! Which I guess is a great thing, I'm just not used to being the slow one in a group!

I've made my contributions - thankfully neither of them can do powerpoint so I got the honor of putting that together. At least I feel like I've done SOMETHING!

Of course the weather this week has decided to thaw out so my allergies have kicked back in. Last night I was up at 1, and then again at 4. Of course at 4 I couldn't get back to sleep and the last I remember looking at the clock it was 6:20 (and of course the alarm goes off at 6:50 to get Princess up and ready for school!)

Now my voice is crackling and I have an awful feeling that even if I keep my mouth shut all day I'm still not going to be able to talk much tonight. Perfect day to get no sleep and lose my voice!

Ah well, it will all work out in the end!

Another Poll

I logged onto AOL (yeah, yeah, don't even get me started. In my defense I've been using AOL since 1989 and heck - it's just a hard habit to break! I do use it less and less as the days go by, but I guess I'm just addicted to being spoon fed....Anyway!)

I logged on the other day and on the main welcome page there was a headline that went something like "President Bush says we're winning in Iraq. Tell us what you think" With a link to a page where they took a poll asking if I thought we were winning in Iraq.

Crap like this REALLY pisses me off. The media have somehow lulled us in the past 20 years into thinking we have all the facts. And that based on what we see on TV (and the few people who bother to read the newspaper) we are qualifed to make judgements on ANYTHING! Nevermind that most people can't name their Senators or Representatives in Congress - let alone find Iraq on a map!! But hell yeah, let's just change our foreign policy based on a poll of people who are getting their information from the American media. Gee, that sounds like a really great plan to me.

And speaking of the media. The Gubernatorial race here in Michigan is making me SICK to my stomach. The ads both sides are running are so obviously full of half truths, I can't bring myself to vote for either of them. On top of that (and the one that REALLY pisses me off) is our current Democratic governor has taken to running a horrid commercial about her stand on abortion, verses that of her opponent. Not even taking into account that the ad makes me want to run out and vote for the Republican, what gets me is this... Since when does the Governor have any control over the availability of abortions in Michigan? Seriously? What point does this ad serve other than to try and get stupid people to change their opinions based on some perceived injustice?

I guess it mostly angers me that the American public is content with being so ignorant of what is going on around them. I'd like to run an experiment and get an advertising campaign going on a national network. Something stupid like "profits from snow shovels linked to terrorism" and see if we can get everybody in the north to stop buying shovels to shovel their driveways. Or maybe "eating marshmallows linked to weight loss" - maybe we could get marshmallow sales up!

What I didn't do

I didn't do the homework I should have done today (as usual, there is always tomorrow *sigh*)

What DID I do today?

I went to see a movie with my dad.

Facing the Giants

All I can say is WOW.

I've seen the reviews, heard it was a low budget movie, where the preaching didn't come through as "preachy" or rehearsed as most low budget "God movies".

I wasn't prepared for how relevant the movie was...at least for me.

I've said it before, but it seems that saying it out loud enough times isn't helping me get the point. I have become lazy in my faith. So lazy. I am failing my daughter in this respect and my parents are getting down right rude about it (which of course just makes me stay away from church all the more, 'cause you know, I'm acting like a child!)

Anyway, the movie...

Basically it was the story of a coach at a Christian High School in Georgia and his struggle with an average football team. Since they have nothing to lose, they decide to turn their team over to God and praise Him in losing - and if it is His will - winning. With his young wife, there are financial struggles, a car that never starts, a stove that stops working...and unforseen medical expenses when they start to investigate infertility problems.

OK, that's not the best synopsis ever, but you get the point.

I won't ruin the story for you, but let me say what caught my breath was the way that God answered some of the prayers of the characters in this story. Having watched my child die, I guess I am used to being on the "losing" end of the prayer thing. Which isn't to say that I haven't seen Him perform miracles in the lives of other children with cancer. And these miracles did not always go to God-fearing families who were spending hours on their knees. It is enough for me to know that His way is higher than mine, and that I need not know why He does what He does. But, it's also easy to forget that there are miracles out there. There are so many challenges in my life that I forget to give over ownership of all the crap. It's easier to hold onto it, easier to do it all myself. But His glory will not thrive in my life is I continue to close off rooms in my heart.

The story that they told in the film went something like this "Two farmers were watching their crops die because it had not rained. Both prayed for rain. But only one farmer was preparing his fields for the rain, while the other continued to pray. Which one do you think really believed that God could send the rain?"

And which kind of farmer do I want to be? Am I preparing my life to bloom where it is planted? Not most days. Most days I am trying desperately to dig my life up and plant it someplace else. Someplace better. Someplace with fewer challenges. Someplace easier.

Did Job replant himself when God allowed his trials to descend upon him? I think not! (and lets face it, I'm definately no Job)

And then the movie ended with one of my favorite Casting Crowns songs

"Voice of Truth"

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand

..........

So I guess I'm going to resolve to let Him take my hand, because I cannot (CANNOT) do this myself.

Writing

I haven't been writing lately.

Oh, I've been blogging...but for the most part I don't feel like I've been writing. Not the creative, lay your feelings on the line kind of writing. Nothing has pushed it's way to the front of my brain for a long time. At least nothing screaming "Write me! Write me!"

It's silly, really it is. I feel sort of lost without this passion. I love to write and the fact that I haven't felt like it lately has contributed a large part to the funk that I've been feeling. It's not the sort of thing you can force yourself to do. Well, I can't anyway. I want it to come back. Or maybe I just want it to come back so I can feel like I'm on the upswing of whatever this cloud is.

Starting next week I'm back to working 3 days a week for a few hours. Maybe something to fill my days will help my brain get back on track. Maybe... I don't know.

Life without passion is very dull indeed. I suppose I should be thankful for these mundane, boring times in my life. But in the end I want to find my way back to a me that I used to be. Then again, is that a good thing to wish for? Should I be trying to work forward and create some new version of me instead of trying to put pieces back together to create an old me - a me that I was comfortbable with and understood.

It's all so frustrating! Being the patient person that I am (NOT!) I'm just going to have to ride this out and see where I end up.

Mish Mash

Gosh, it's been a day!

For starters, I need to complain about the weather! Oh My Goodness! It's cold! We're setting record low "high" temps here in West Michigan and man, are my toes feeling it!

Next up a brief rant on the people I carpool with. Come to find out this week M-W one of the girls that I bring home after school was out of town with her parents. Do you think they bothered to tell me that I wouldn't need to pick her up? Or that I should pick her up Thursday? But, I handled it, because hey, she has 3 young kids and sometimes your brain just doesn't connect all the dots, you think you told somebody something and you didn't. It's an honest mistake. So, I go to get her Friday and her teacher says that dad was a chaperone on the field trip today and she went home with him. WHAT?!! Oh, but wait, it gets better. Turns out my mom hears through the grapevine that this sweet child is staying with her grandparents next week because mom & dad are out of town. Do you think anybody mentioned this to me?!!

It's just those little things that add up during the week and make you want to explode. Princess was home again this weekend, which meant another football game for mommy (did I mention how cold it is here?). So, being the smart mommy that I am - I headed over to Meijer and hit the hunting aisle and picked up toe and hand warmers. And not just for me & Princess, but for all 10 girls...because, hey, that's just the kind of nice mom that I am. While I was there I even found black fleece headbands on sale for 3 bucks so I bought them too. Figured if all the girls had them, the coach would have to let them wear something! While I'm leaving the store I get a call from the coach. She's in major stress mode, trying to get ready for a party Saturday afternoon and she checked the by-laws which say if the coach can't make it a parent can step in so could I please run the game....

Have I mentioned yet that the game was 1/2 north of here and it started at 8:30 which means the cheerleaders needed to show up by 8? Oh, yeah, I was stinkin' thrilled. But, since I was going to be there anyway, I told her I'd be happy to. Don't worry about it, I said, we'll be fine! What was I thinking? It was like every parent there had it in for us. Nobody was on time. Sure, it was out of town so there were some who got a little lost, but some of us managed to give ourselves extra time knowing we were venturing into uncharted territory. I feel a little bad now because I grumbled a little more than I probably should have to a couple of other moms. But, in my defense it was 8 in the morning and it was 35 degrees out! One of the dad's popped off with a comment about how he was going to call the rocket football league because he was tired of our coach. I hope he doesn't, I mean we only have one game left after all, why ruin it for the poor volunteer coaches who (I hope) are just doing the best they can. Even if they are annoying us!

Aside from the cold the game was fun, the girls did great. After the game we had carnival at Princess' school. We hung out there for a couple hours and then came back home for a peaceful afternoon. It was nice to just be able to spend time with her - without anyplace we needed to be and anything we really needed to be doing.

Now, as not to spend all of my posts complaining...

I was thinking this week about something I had never thought about before. I went on a burger run earlier this week and picked up burgers and fries for lunch or dinner or something for me and mom & dad. And I thought, how great is it that with all the tastes of all the foods, our God created the midwest full of cows and tomatoes and potatoes. Because what goes better with a burger than catsup? How is it that lime trees grow down south? When we all know that nothing goes better with seafood then a great big slice of key lime pie for dessert? How amazing is it that our God loves us so much that he has provided these little pleasures for us. Things we take so for granted that we don't usually even think about them. He could have created a world where there was no pleasure in eating. Where there were no onions or mushrooms to put on our burgers. But He didn't. In the myriad of arguments against this world being created as an accident I would have to ask this one "What are the odds that so many plants on this planet are fit to be consumed by it's inhabitants?" If it were all truly an accident my bet would be that we would not have nearly as many wonderful things to eat!

Just a thought :-)

Because...

...if I'm annoyed, then you should be too!

Here's just a taste of how a good part of my day went (picture yourself in the mini-van driving to and from school with 5 children in the van with you)

Going to school...

This is the song that never ends.
Yes it goes on, and on my friend,
Some people, started singing it not knowing what it was,
And they'll continue singing it forever just because,
This is the song that never ends.
Yes it goes on, and on my friend,

...you get the point.

So I get smart and on the way home I say "absolutely no one is singing the song we sang on the way to school this morning"

So I give you the ride home...

I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
Everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves. I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,
And this is how it goes...
(Next verse, same as the first, it never gets better, it only gets worse.)
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves,

Ah, I'm gonna have to shoot whoever taught them that second one 'cause when they left for school this morning, they only knew the one!

Gone Fishin'

How I would love to just put a sign on my door "gone fishin'".

I've decided it's hopeless to try to finish 3 of my classes. The 3 that I am taking with the same professor. I know my limits and I need certain things to succeed and he is not givine me ANYTHING to work with! I'll just bite the bullet and withdraw from the classes - take them again next semester. I still have one class I can finish and hopefully the doctor's office will be able to find some hours for me - because you know those darn financial aid people are going to want their money back! I think I'm OK with the whole thing, but I hate being in this situation. This means classes again next summer. GRRRRR

It helps if I blame it on idiot (although it's sort of a stretch to go there). He's off camping again this weekend...and next...So that means less time for homework and more carting the princess around. Only 3 more games left though, I have to take her to at least 2 of those, which means mister "we'd love to take her to the games" will have taken her to a whopping two games total. Oh, well, 3 if we count the varsity game she got invited to from her cheer clinich this summer.

She's been complaining about her knee for a while now and the coach at the gym tonight said we should probably get it looked at - said he thinks it looks a little bit "crooked". UM? CROOKED? Not sure exactly what that means, but I figure it's probably not a good thing! I'm also fairly sure that a referral is going to mean a CT - and I'm just not sure...well I AM sure that I'm going to be totally panicked the whole time we are in radiology. I'm tired of my brain screaming cancer everytime my daughter doesn't feel good.

She also hasn't gotten up enough nerve to decide completely that she isn't going camping with idiot this weekend. She doesn't want to go - she wants to stay home and go to her game. She LOVES cheerleading (shhhhh! don't tell!). But you know, he's going to make her feel guilty and like she's letting him down. Of course, mention that he could stay home too and take her to the game? Heaven forbid!

We had fun with her home this weekend though. She ordered a "how to crochet" book with her last scholastic book order so this weekend she crocheted over a pony and it came out so cute! After cheerleading we went to see a movie with Sweetie and her mom and little brother. Over the Hedge was the Dove film this week. For the bargain price of $2 for adults and all kids free we packed into a movie theater with 500 other people and laughed our butts off. Now, Sweetie's little brother is only 6 (and acts younger than that) so I'm not sure it's the kind of movie I would have taken him to - but then again I wouldn't have taken him to see Harry Potter 4 or Pirate of the Carribbean 2 either, so I guess this one was tame by comparison.

I don't think I'm happy right now. I hate being on the verge of whatever this is.

I don't want to be this girl. The one slowly losing grip on reality. I want to be the together one. The one who knows what she wants, and somehow pulls it all together.

I wonder where she went?

Happy Birthday Princess

It's hard to believe she's 9 already...









But of course for every celebration there is the quiet tugging on my heart...




...what would he have been like when he was 9?

Procrastinating (as usual)

Honestly, I have so much I SHOULD be doing right now! But, my brain just can't take it anymore. I have two (count them, one, TWO) tests tomorrow and I don't feel like I'm prepared for either of them. What I am prepared for is having to take some of these classes again next semester because I just don't feel like I'm "getting it" the first time around. We'll see, maybe in the next few weeks some magic switch will magically go on and it will all become clear!

It's been a busy weekend here. Idiot actually took Princess Friday night, which left plenty of time for me to do homework. She took part in a cheer clinic this summer that the Varsity girls ran as a fund raiser this summer. As part of her "graduation" she got invited to go cheer for the 1st quarter of a Varsity game - which happened to be last Friday. So, idiot picked her up about his usual 5:00 and then had to have her at the field by 6:15. On top of that she had her game Saturday morning for her junior cheer. They had to be at the field at 7:45! (so glad it wasn't me!) Plus it was an away game, 30 minute drive on top of having to be there so early.....really, REALLY glad it wasn't me! I am NOT a morning person! It was cold and rainy and her shoes are covered in mud, but she says they had a good time.

Go figure, she likes cheerleading so much she can't even complain about being out in the 50 degree rainy weather!

On top of all my homework we are gearing up for Princess' birthday. It's on Tuesday and it just seems like there is so much to do! She decided she wanted to make chocolate pretzels for her school treat (you buy the chocolate buttons by the bakers stuff and melt them and then dip the pretzels and then lay them out on wax paper to dry......which if you don't want to waste a lot of chocolate takes a while because you hand dip each pretzel. I'm thinking about going back to the store to get more chocolate and lining all the pretzels up and just pouring it over!!) She's going to be 9. I can hardly believe my baby is going to be NINE! We're taking a couple friends ice skating this afternoon. Then back to grandma's for birthday cake and to play for a few minutes. Of course we still need to be at her tumbling class by 6.

Maybe I can convince her not to go to tumbling tonight? I've got class til 7 tomorrow night so I really don't know when we are going to make pretzels!

We'll figure it out. I really don't need to sleep anyway, right?

And for those of you who have given up checking - the National Geographic cam was up about 11:00(eastern) when I checked it. So, hang in there and just keep checking :-)

What in the world?

You know how some days you just really, really wonder what is wrong with people? What have we become as Americans (well, inhabitants of the planet earth in general) over the last few generations that causes so many people to act in ways that make you wanna say WTF!

GO HERE

No, really, you could GO HERE TOO

Now, had enough?

Well, in that case, you should definately GO HERE to unwind (best viewing time is 12-4 am Eastern or 4-8 pm Eastern, and be patient because it's offline a lot, but your first glance at a live giraffe in the middle of Africa drinking from a pond and I know you'll be hooked just like me :-) )

My Brain Hurts

All summer, when I felt like I was getting my ass kicked in Calculus 2.....well it turns out I might as well have been on vacation. 'Cause what's really killin' me are my classes this semester! I have never had so much homework. Most of which I avoid doing because I just don't "get" most of it. I'm going to have to break down and start working with a tutor and let me just tell you how much that kills me!

Like I have time in my life for a tutor. Like I am actually going to get off my butt and try and find one next week (you know, in all my spare time).

Next week I start observing a geometry class.

Have I mentioned that I can't wait for this semester to be over?

I am so tired. At the end of the day I am just plain mentally exhausted.

Idiot is off camping this weekend. I'm just so glad he agreed to take on this whole cheerleading project. Let's see, he's taken her to precisely....oh right, ZERO games! I know, I know, I'm not really complaining because I like to be involved. But geesh, if you tell your kid you're going to do something you don't turn around and make plans to go camping (and then make her feel guilty because she doens't want to go camping with you). GRRRRR

So, Princess gets to have Sweetie over for a sleepover tomorrow. We'll pick her up after the football game and pig out on junk food and watch movies and listen to the Cheetah Girls CD, all the while dancing around the living room like idiots.

Did we all see Gray's Anatomy on Thursday?!!(it was really, really good Christy :-P) How great is this season going to be?!! Not much else is drawing my attention this season. I did watch Studio 60 on Sunset Strip. I think that's a maybe, but it makes me wish West Wing was back. I watched Law & Order tonight, and I wasn't too impressed. Feels like it's going to be Numbers here on Friday night, except maybe when the reruns come on. I didn't watch ER, didn't even interest me. And I DON'T do any of the reality TV (which drives my mother crazy every time she misses a show and asks me what happened).

My allergies are killing me, i have to take so much medication to be able to breath that i can't stay awake (she says as she types at 1:30 am.....but that's because I slept so long this afternoon!)

Man, I can't even follow a complete thought through, can I? I better go crawl in bed and rest up for sitting in the rain at Princess' game tomorrow *sigh*

The good and the bad

It's always good to get the bad news out of the way first. So, the bad news is - my internet was down all weekend! A girl could suffer serious withdrawl symptoms!

But, the good news! I had a ton of homework this weekend, and without internet I got a ton done. Plus, it was a gorgeous weekend! Princess had another 4:00 football game so we didn't have to drag ourselves out of bed early AND we got to enjoy the perfect football afternoon.

You should have seen the game, it was priceless. We got to the field and the boys were already on the practice field warming up so the girls grabbed a corner and started stretching. Once the game before us got done the boys headed over to the playing field and the girls followed in close order. When the boys realized that the cheerleaders were coming to their field there were many shouts of "hey, we have CHEERLEADERS today!" (I have never laughed so hard in my life - you should have heard them!) But, it was cute. The boys were thrilled, the girls were thrilled and we even won the game 22-6. Ya can't beat that!

Fashion DON'T (and other rants)

So, it was cold and rainy again today. Not complaining TOO loud because we do need the rain. But does it have to rain the hardest at the exact moments I need to walk from my vehicle all the way across campus to get to my class? Why don't college campuses have parking lots adjacent to their largest classroom buildings? Why are the best and biggest parking lots on the side of the campus that has the football field? Where, may I add, there are NO classrooms?

Ranting about the rain. Do they NOT teach young drivers how to drive anymore? Leave extra space between you and the car in front of you when it's raining this hard because you WON'T be able to stop. There is a TON of water on the road and you are going to get yourself hurt! (mostly because I am going to slap you silly if you cut me off one more time....) AND have automatic lights made us freakin stupid? When it's dark and raining and gray (especially if you have a silver car people!) turn your damn lights on. AND when the power goes out, that light at the busy intersection that's out - yeah, it doesn't mean you can drive right through it because the car in front of you went through it, it's a four way stop! Or have the rules of driving changed since I went through drivers ed?

....and that was just my drive TO school :-)

Now, fashion police. If you are older than me and have obviously had a couple kids (or a couple too many cases of beer) you should NOT cut the bottoms off your t-shirts so that you can wear them 1/2 an inch above your jeans and let your roll of fat jiggle for all to see. Next, if you are a poor college student and the only pair of shoes that you have are flip flops (you know the cheap kind with the annoying hard piece of plastic that goes between your toes)I don't care HOW cold it is, please, please, PLEASE, do NOT wear socks with your flip flops!

I am now going back to figuring out how a vector of origin relates to the centroid of a flippin triangle (can you tell I am more than a little stressed right now?!)

9/11/01

Did you know that MSNBC ran the Today show coverage live this morning.....the rerun from 2001? I wish I would have known. I didn't get to see it the first time and I would have liked to have seen the whole thing. As it was I didn't turn the TV on until 11 and by then the events had all transpired. (Although I did get to see Katie Couric ask a Congressman if Congress was indeed meeting today and if so, where...oh yeah, the Capitol building was a possible target, so let's just announce on NBC where all of Congress is at the moment, brilliant journalism!) But, I digress.

I have looked all over to see if there was a master list somewhere of all the bloggers posting with the 2,996. Many of the people on my AOL alerts, and my Bloglines have posted wonderful tributes....I wish I would have made a note of all of them so I could share them with you. They were, after all, everyday people just like the rest of us.....people who were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

UPDATE: No wonder I couldn't find the master list for the 2996 project, I suspect the site is especially overloaded today....but you can access the list through a cache. Here's the google memory

Today is my dad's birthday. 59 this year! Hard to imagine having a birthday on such a "historic" day. I suspect we will have dinner and cake and enjoy our evening as if it was any other day.

I stayed home from school today. I was seriously in need of a mental health day. Taking classes all summer was just too much, and my break between summer and fall classes was NOT long enough! So as soon as the kids arrived this morning we were off to school and then I came home, layed on the couch and enjoyed the quiet. It was delicious!

Now, there are many wonderful tributes out there, but as I mentioned, I didn't bookmark any of them. So let me leave you with a choice of these two sites (they are both very similar so you can pick one or the other) Jimmy put one together 5 years ago, and another one more recently. Enjoy!

His Blog
On AOL

Finally!

Finally! I finally got the pictures to load! I know you've all been waiting patiently *giggle* So I present to you the first day of 3rd grade. This is Princess (left) and her best friend in the whole world. Sweetie & Princess are crushed this year because they don't have the same teacher. Somehow I think they'll survive! And I'm quite sure they will remain fast friends despite the separation during the day :-)

Next I guess I have to share. Cheerleading pictures *sigh* Lucky for them they were adorable, but it was a rare occassion when they were all doing the same moves or saying the same words! But, they had fun, and really, that's all that counts, right??
It was only 60 here today and a chilly wind. Our team lost 8-0. The only bright spot in the day......it wasn't raining by the time the game started. She has to go to another game Tuesday night. It better be warmer!!

Warp Speed

On a lighter note, 40 years ago today Star Trek hit the air waves.

When Enterprise was cancelled last year it was the first time in 25 years that there was no Star Trek series or movie in production or development.

Isn't that unreal?

Call me crazy now, but I LOVE everything Star Trek. Beam me up, Scotty. I Love the crappy original episodes with unbelievable plots..damnit Jim, I'm a doctor not a bricklayer..., love Next Generation, Deep Space Nine and even Enterprise. I even admit to loving all the movies (yes, including the really BAD ones!). OOPS, forgot Voyager, I never really did catch up with that one, but the few episodes I did see, yup - loved 'em!

Let's hope for another 40 years of nerds dreaming and reaching for the stars, and most especially attending Star Trek Conventions. Because, hey, if we're all at the convention center at least you know where to avoid :-)

But, until that next convention let's lay in a course, warp factor 4

Engage

Public Schools

There was a little blurb on the radio station that I listen to. It was talking about the growing trend of restricted recess. You know what I mean. First teeter-totters and merry-go-rounds had to go because they were too dangerous. Then we needed to make sure there was 6 inches of wood chips under the swings and other playing equipment because that was too dangerous. Next it was dodgeball, TOO DANGEROUS! Never mind punishing the few kids who are ruining it for everybody because they are mean and like to inflict pain. Anyway, so the blurb on the news said a local school district has now banned Tag as a recess game. Too dangerous, afraid somebody will get poked in the eye or pushed too hard, or they will be so busy trying not to get tagged they won't be looking where they are going and run into something. PLEASE stop the insanity! I've heard reports that include some school districts have banned recess altogether - and not to gain more teaching time but because it's too dangerous. This is a very good thing to teach our kids. Let's not work together to make a system that works, let's just bow to the lowest among us and avoid anything that may result in a lawsuit. Yeah, that works for me - NOT!

On a similar subject. Our local police forces are sponsoring a gun buy back program this weekend. Now, I'm all for getting guns off the street and I'm sure there are plenty of statistics that say the buy back programs work. BUT, and come along with me now. They are offering to give debit cards in exchange for these guns (because money is the only incentive that "works"). Well, what about the rest of us law abiding citizens who DON'T have illegal firearms in our homes? Dang, I could use $100 to spend at our local Meijer store. But hey, let's just keep rewarding the criminals. We're doing it on a lesser level in our school systems so why not in the entire community through the police force. Yeah, that works for me too.

(As usual, I should be working on homework.....can you tell I'm rushing right off to do that?)

One of the classes that I am taking is a class called "Math Activities for Secondary Teachers". As part of this class we need to do 20 hours this semester of class room observation. The placement options were posted today and they were ALL grade A high schools (where we, as new teachers have NO hope of getting a job). Well, this should be useful. Let me go and observe this "great" teacher who is teaching math to kids who already want to learn. That should be useful in my teaching career. I e-mailed my teacher and asked her if she could find me a placement in a city school. I think she probably gagged on her coffee because her reply was that nobody had ever asked her that before. She said she's look into it. I'm guessing, however, that for the next 10 weeks I'll be sitting in the back of some Upper Middle Class 100% white AP Calculus class (or something eqully dull). Gosh, the other kids in my class will really get a good taste of what teaching is like, won't they?

I sound bitter, do I sound bitter? I guess the two articles on the radio about recess and the gun buy back just sent me over the edge today.

From the sounds of it, Jimmy has had enough too - you should go read his latest post

Since I didn't have breakfast, maybe I'll go find myself somethin' for an early lunch. (That way I can avoid that homework just a little bit longer!)

Respite

Thousands of parents across the country are full of mixed emotions today.

BACK TO SCHOOL!!

You're happy that you don't have to hear "I'm bored" one more time. You're happy that your job as chauffer is now limited to after school. You're thrilled that education is back in the forefront of your child's mind.

But, you'll miss them (ok, not all the time, but the house does seem blissfully quiet today).

Princess started 3rd grade today (really, she did, I have pictures that sort of prove it, but camera is NOT cooperating). She looked adorable! I'm not sure she really wanted to go, but by the time I picked her up I saw nothing but grins :-) She can't wait to go back tomorrow. They all got the cutest little "homework organizers" as gifts from their teachers. She feels so grown up! Now if I can just get her to fall asleep tonight!

Last night was the longest ever. She was so worked up about school she couldn't fall asleep. And then woke up at 5 this morning with a tummy ache. I wasn't sure she was going to make it to school. Ah well, she's good and exhausted now and when she gets back from idiot's and crawls in bed she is going to fall asleep in about 2 seconds.

Back to school for me tomorrow (and gosh you'll be surprised to hear I have only finished about 1/3 of my homework). I'm gonna be up late tonight - with nobody to blame but myself!

Labor Day

The work force is what makes America great. It's what makes us different from so much of the rest of the world. If you're lucky enough to find a job and work hard, you can "live the American dream". You can have a family and a house and food on your table - so many choices that most people in the world can't comprehend it when it is explained to them. They simply have no frame of reference for a WalMart!

And I know it's not Memorial Day or Armed Forces day, but let's say a special prayer for the soldiers who are out there on the front lines, who have worked every day they have been deployed, only enjoying a rare "day off".

Enjoy a few words about the war from the point of view of a soldier and go

visit John

No homework for miles

I didn't do a lick of homework today! I should feel some pang of guilt for procrastinating - but all I'll probably feel is frustration as I spend Sunday, Monday & Tuesday trying to finish it. And that, of course, is assuming that I start it tomorrow.

We spent most of the day at my mom's house where Princess amused herself helping Papa scrape paint. They worked on the front picture window and the frame around the garage. They might even get it painted this weekend. My mom will probably die if they do - my dad is not one that is known for finishing projects that he starts. Several times today her refered to princess as a slave driver! rofl Throughout the day we played Zooreka on and off. This game rocks! It's a Cranium product and it's tons of fun. If you have kids you need to have at least one Cranium game in your inventory!

The rest of the time (you know, when I SHOULD have been doing homework) I was reading Godless by Ann Coulter. She cracks me up! (and in a good way). I can't say I've ever leaned to the left in my political views, and I seem to lean more right the older I get. Well, except for the gun thing, I really don't get the gun thing. Mostly what I don't understand is why 70% of the country claims to be Christian and yet we sit silently and hide our light in a closet instead of taking a stand. And, ok, reading Ann Coulter and Christians taking a stand don't exactly have anything to do with each other, it's just sort of where my brain went today.

Have I mentioned that I'm taking Princess to see the Cheetah Girls in concert in November? ACK! 36.50 a ticket PLUS THIRTEEN, yes THIRTEEN dollars in fees! for a stinkin concert (i guess disney knows how to make money!) I'm bringing reinforcements in the form of Sweetie and her mom and we are going to make a night of it. If you're going to get fleeced in Detroit it's always good to go with friends :-)

I got Batman Begins on sale today at Target for ten bucks. That doesn't have much to do with the rest of the post, but gosh what a deal!

Things I meant to do.....

Wow, I'm exhausted! I meant to be better this week. I meant to have my homework finished already (haven't even started on it). I meant to clean off my dining room table (HA! Like that's going to happen). And then Em tagged me and I meant to do a great post on books that I love (I'll do it, really!).

But, it's 9:00, I'm watching Gray's Anatomy and I am just exhausted. We did NOT ride the train today. Princess decided that she didn't want to ride it bad enough to arrive for the 6:35 departure (thank goodness). We DID go to Michigan Adventure today, which was a blast! I cannot believe how lucky we got with our amusement park trips this year. Hardly anybody at the park today, the longest we waited for a ride was MAYBE 5 minutes. But it was rare to have to wait at all. We had tons of fun. Princess wanted to stay, but I told her 5 hours was enough for mom! We headed back home and dragged ourselves to orientation at school tonight. Listened to the usual blather about our high academic standards, high behavioral standards, moral focus, yadda yadda. Don't get me wrong, I do love our school but it gets old dragging yourself into a mandatory meeting every year to listen to the same thing. Turns out last school year our school ranked #4 out of the 51 charter schools in our organization. (I knew we were good!)

Princess got to see some friends she hadn't seen all summer. Tomorrow we are going ice skating one last time before school starts for her. And it turns out her "boyfriend" is going to be there too. Ah, young love :-)

So, where was I going with all this? Oh yeah, I'm sitting here stuffing my face with my mom's homemade apple pie. And I do mean home-made. Crust from scratch and everything. It's heaven. Trying very hard not to remember all the things I should be doing. I'd like to be sleeping. But that homework isn't going anywhere, and I should get to that sooner rather than later.

And so it begins...

First day of classes. Where to begin? Yesterday I was about to print a copy of my schedule (this is about 6pm) when I thought, gosh, I wonder if the class I really (REALLY) want to take is still full. They are only offering 2 sections of it this semester and I haven't been able to get into it since registration opened in March. And WOO HOO! ONE seat open. Of course this meant I had to change around ALL my other classes! So I did. Informed my mom at 9:30 last night when she got home that her babysitting duties had changed. She wasn't thrilled, but it didn't change TOO much, so she could adjust.

Fast forward to my first class at 9 this morning. The teacher was great, the class is going to be everything I hoped it would be AND he teaches Calc 3, which I wasn't able to get into this semester. AND he teaches at 10, right after the other class. So, I thought, what the heck....can't hurt to ask......And after class I asked him if he would grant me a closed class permit to take his Calc 3. He asked me what else I was taking and we went over my schedule, in the end he granted me a closed class permit for his Calc 3 section and the class that he teaches at 11 (which I was going to take with another prof on T/H). I guess I best hope that he turns out to be as nice as he seems since I am going to be spending 3 hours in a row with him MW and Friday! This is going to mean dropping my Educational Psychology class, but I can take that next semester.....or maybe CLEP it? I haven't decided yet. My original plan was to CLEP it, but I need to bring my overall psych GPA up.....

Ah well, one thing at a time, right?

My class this evening was an entirely "other" story. Not sure I'm going to like it! But, it's required to get into the College of Education, so I don't have a choice. It's only a 3 credit class and we meet twice a week for 1 hr & 50 minutes. PLUS we are required to observe 2 hours a week at a local high school PLUS the additional homework, etc..... This is SO NOT a 3 credit class! I'm emailing the department tonight to ask them just what they are thinking!

Not that they'll care, I'm sure - LOL

Poor Princess is suffering from emotional overload. She spent almost a week with just my mom up north the week I took finals week. Then I worked so many hours last week and now she's just ready to have a down day with boring old mom and Thursday seems to be too far off! I'll be thankful when school starts for her next week and we can be back to a normal schedule.

And can somebody please tell me.....

Where did this summer go?!!

Ah Weekends!

Don't you just love weekends? I survived my week at the doctor's office and looking back I can honestly say, "I'm going to miss it". It's true. I always leave there feeling like I've put in a good day's work. Everybody is nice to work with. You couldn't ask for a nicer place to work.

Even if my feet are killing me!

Do you know what it's like to wear pumps all week after 6 months of sneakers??

On a school note.....

One of my professors (educational psych) posted his 5 page syllabus the other day. Where he says, (and I quote here) Some of my personal prejudices that I have developed over the course of teaching at the University level:

1. Students that ask if I have a stapler.
2. Students that email me without identifying themselves or their section.
3. Students that turn in work without identifying their section.
4. Students that miss class and then email me to see what they missed
(ask another student instead!).
5. Students that miss class or carry on side conversations in class and then wonder why they don't do well! It's obvious!

I'm either going to love this guy or really hate him, I'll let you know after the first day of class.

Princess survived spending the night with idiot. Her Grandma & Grandpa came into town to see idiot's new house and decided they better come on a night that princess was there since they haven't seen her since Christmas (mind you they only live 45 minutes away).

I'm going to surprise Princess on Thursday with a train ride! Amtrak leaves here and has a stop less than an hour away. Tickets are only $7.50! Bad part, it leaves at 7:30 in the morning! But, she has always wanted to ride on the train and since idiot fell through on his promise to take her to Chicago this summer (because his wife couldn't get any time off work?!! Like he can't take a day trip with his daughter?!! Don't get me started......) She's going to be so excited, I can't wait to see her face.

I need to get a picture of her in her cheerleader uniform. She had team pictures taken Thursday night, but I'm not hopeful that they are going to turn out that great. It was the most unorganized mess I've ever had to be a part of.

Ah well, she was just excited to get to wear her uniform for a while.

I don't want to be a cheerleader mom!

OH!

I know this was highlighted on a lot of 11:00 news programs tonight, but you have GOT to check this out!

Fantasy Husband

Real World

Having spent the last two days in the "real world" I already need a vacation! I forgot how exhausting it was to be in a fast paced doctor's office all day. My feet are killing me from wearing grown up shoes. My head is still pounding from the phones ringing all day. Basically I'm falling apart. Suddenly I am longing to be back in that Calc 2 class.

The other half of being back in the real world.....dealing with all the stupid people! I had forgotten how many clueless, CLUELESS people there are out there! Here's one of my top pet peeves......

+ring+ +ring+ "Dr's office, Kelly speaking can I help you" "uh, yeah, dis number was on my caller ID and i wanna know why you be callin me"......."well, this is Dr's X, Y & Z office, is anybody at your house a patient here?"....."I dunno, maybe my moms but she ain't here right now, so why was you callin her?" At this point the phone should just be slammed down in this idiot's ear, but being the seemingly nice professional that I am, I politely tell him he'll have to have his mom call back when she gets in and maybe then we can get it straightened out.

I mean, COME ON! there are 20 people in the office who could have made that call and unless you can tell me the patients name, or maybe even narrow it down to which of the four doctors i need to start with.....there's no hope of figuring out who called you! Some people are such morons!

And this occurs frequently! Here's a hint people, if you have caller ID and you want to know WHY we are calling you.....get a freakin' answering machine!

This is the 21st Century right?

Phew, I feel so much better now :-)

Tomorrow Princess has to get her allergy shots and then after lunch we are going ice skating with one of her friends. Ice skate for 2 hours for 5 bucks (including skate rental) how great is that in the summer? Cool off in the 50 degree ice arena and then go back out and play in the sunshine. It's our best discovery this summer.

After that, back to work Thursday and Friday. If I survive that, I get a night to myself Friday night while Princess sleeps over at her dad's and visits with his parents. I definitely think there will be a movie for me Saturday morning. I don't even care if there's anything good playing!

I can't even believe this is how I am spending my one week off from school! What was I thinking?!! (oh, right, darn bills........)

Where?

It seems my journaling pixie has been seriously MIA this year. While school and princess have certainly kept me busy, I feel a pang of guilt for not taking this time for myself.

Things in my neck of the woods are starting to look up. Exams for the summer are over. 1st half I took Intro to Education and Psychology of Disabilities, and pulled in an A and B+ respectively. 2nd half of the summer kicked my butt! I am not having good luck with my math teachers and pulled another insane one for my Calc 2. Calc 2 had me in class M-F for 2 hours a day - which you can imagine was not a thrilling prospect during the best part of summer in Michigan! With Calc 2 I also took Technology in Education, which was an online class. I wish I could take more of my classes online - it rocked! Got an A in my online class and somehow managed to pull a B- out of Calc 2. I thought for sure psycho teacher was going to hand me a big ole C. Ah well, I'll take that B anyway I can get it.

I have a whole week off before heading back to class on the 28th. The doctor's office called and asked me to come in and fill in for one of the girls that is going on vacation....so much for having a week off. I'm a little bummed, since I haven't really spent a lot of time with Princess this summer, but glad for the money since I haven't worked since spring and student loans only last so long.

Two more weeks until princess goes back to school. I've only got 4 classes for fall semester so I'm thinking maybe I'll skip one day of class my first week and take her to Cedar Point or Great America.....or maybe just keep it local and go to Michigan Adventure. We'll see.

Oh, princess starts junior cheer next week. I'm trying not to gag on the thought, and I'm sure they will all be cute and adorable.....but a cheerleader? really? I'm starting to think they sent me home with somebody else's child :-)

Mondays are so painful!

Don't you just hate Mondays after you have had a weekend off? Princess just does NOT want to wake up. It's a chore to get her ready for school. Heck, it's a chore to get ME ready for school! Especially since I knew I had a test first thing. Our Prof had told us last Wed that he was covering another class (at one the other campus no less) and that he would be late to our class - but that he would have somebody from the office come protor the exam.

Class is supposed to start at noon. noon plus ten and STILL nobody to give us the test...we had to send somebody to the office to ASK them to come give us the test. Geesh. Thankfully it was only 60 questions, multiple choice. I think (hope) I got a B on it. There were a few, thinking back, that I think I got wrong. So, we'll see! The two hours of lecture after the test, were sort of a blur.

Tomorrow I'm going to school with Princess in the morning. There's a bulletin board with my name on it! All the Flat Stanleys have come back and they need to be proudly displayed on the board outside of class. I volunteered - I love doing bulletin boards :-) Princess sent her Flat Stanley to visit her aunt and uncle in California (and their 1 yr old twins). He had a great time - he went to work with Uncle Scott (Uncle Scott works at Mattel.....how cool of a job is that?!) and he got to see the Pacific Ocean, and even climb a tree. Princess was so excited to see everything that Flat Stanley did.

I'm also going to start tutoring the kids one on one for a few hours each morning (before I go to class). I told the teacher I'd be happy to come in and I was shocked that she had so many kids who need help with the addition facts. Wow! This is the end of 2nd grade. Since there's only a couple weeks of school left, I figured I could squeeze in a few days of volunteering.

OY!! (sorry, CSI: Miami is on and I KNEW she was the mole!)

Have you seen the cute little build-a-bears that McD's is giving out in the Happy Meals? I'm looking forward to day after day of "can we go to McDonald's?" "can we go to McDonald's?" " PLEEEEEASE, can we go to McDonald's?" Lucky for her I'm really good at saying "No!"

Test Me

The bad thing about summer school is the pace of the classes. Cramming 1 week of material into each day of class makes for interesting study patterns. I already have a test in each of my classes this week. I think they will both be fairly easy, but I don't want to take any chances, so studying is the word of the day. And let's not forget the rest of the homework I need to continue working on!

Speaking of homework, I'm going to come to the blog-o-sphere and ask you if you know anybody who is physically disabled who might be willing to answer a couple of general questions. I'm writing a paper on the challenges faced by people with physical handicaps and I thought it might be better if I included some real thoughts, instead of just what the books say. More than that I really want to include the perspective or real people in my paper. So, please, if you know anybody that is paralyzed or an amputee or confined to a wheel chair for another reason, please drop them a line on my behalf and ask them if they have a couple minutes to answer a few questions. (Thanks guys! You're the best :-)

I volunteered to work with the PTO next year. The mom that got roped into being President has a daughter in Princess's class so I took pity on her and volunteered to help. AAAHHHH - I'm not sure it was the best decision on my part. I'm going to be busy next year, but the year after that is student teaching so there's no way I'll be able to help then. And let's face it education is all about parents being involved.

We signed Princess up for Junior Cheerleading the other night. I can't even wrap my mind around the fact that my adorable daughter thinks cheerleading is cool. My nose was too far into the closest book to think about cheerleading. 'Course back in my day the cheerleaders were not always the sharpest tools in the shed. Now it has morphed into a sport at some schools. Well, she can try it now while she's young and see if it's something that she likes. I just have to try to avoid getting roped into being an assistant coach or working at the concession stand!

Here's another question for you, why is it when you are trying to avoid doing anything productive that you can NEVER find anything good on TV?

Armed Forces Day

Tomorrow (May 20, 2006) is Armed Forces Day. I don't think you need to hear my opinion on this one. Support your troops (or else?!! LOL).

I'm thankful that our troops are supported, despite the way many people feel about the "cause". Despite it all, we know that being a soldier is more than just a job.

Now there is a new challenge which is going to spread our military thinner than it already is.

Seems like there is always a new job to be done.

So tomorrow, your job is to go find a military blog and tell somebody how much you appreciate the sacrifices that their family is making for this country.

I pray that God may continue to bless all of those who are and have served in uniform.

Don't you just hate it.....

So, I'm starting to suffer withdrawl. For a couple of reasons. It started a few months ago when the contact solution that I use (AoSept) was completely GONE from shelves in all my local stores. Now, this was before all the eye infection "scare" and Bausch & Lomb pulling one of its products off the shelf. I kept checking the company web site to see if had been discontinued and I couldn't even find reference to it! Well, the good news, now that all the hub-bub hit eye care, there is a letter on the company web site saying they are shipping more! Woo Hoo! So, if they were planning on discontinuing it; well, they aren't anymore! Which makes me a little bit happy.

Unfortunately, this is not the end of my dilemma. I have a weakness for the greatest potato chip ever made. It's a Ruffle's flavor called "The Works". I can't find them anywhere. It's been a month, a girl could die :-) When mom & dad went to Florida I even made them check the stores down there -and no luck. So, I go to the Frito Lay website and it's still listed as one of their products. But, GET THIS! under the "contact us" tab - no email address! Do you think I'm going to remember to call customer service between 8 & 4:30? (or whatever time is actually posted there, I don't even remember!).

In the midst of this dilemma, my darling daughter has been so supportive. We were at the store the other day and as we went down the chip aisle she says "don't even bother looking, you know they're not there". LOL; how well she knows me! Of course since she brought the subject up I took the opportunity to whine a little bit at which point she tells me I better just deal with it, because if she could live through them stopping making her "bites" I could live without my chips.

Now, she had a good point there. I had forgotten that NutriGrain had stopped making her favorite breakfast food. Princess doesn't like to eat much in the morning and this was one of the few things I could get her to eat. At least I think they were Nutrigrain. Anyway, they were one of the fruit/breakfast bars and they had yogurt frosting, of course she would only eat strawberry flavor - but these were bite sized so she could kind of eat one and then come back to the bag a few minutes later.

Gosh, is this going to be another pointless post, or what?!! My brain is so fried from all the reading. I have 2 tests next week already.

Oh, I do have a good Princess story; well, maybe a couple. Pardon me while I go on about how smart she is, but she is my daughter after all. She loves her teacher, she loves 2nd grade and now she has the opportunity to demonstrate to her class how superior she is to all of them, so she is living high on the hog. A couple times a week during math they take a 24 question math fact test (1+4, 6+4....basic stuff) and they have an hour to take it. They all started out at +1 and after they do 24 of those in less than a minute they move on to +2.....up to +10, and then they start on subtraction. Well, there is a group in her class of 5 or 6 kids who are pretty math savvy and they were nipping at her heels up to -8 (most of the class is still back down around +8) and what do you know, the other advanced kids got stuck on that darn -8 and Princess has soared up and did X 4 today and passed on her first try! I'm so excited for her, the next test will be X5 (of course) and she knows those cold (hey, we don't watch schoolhouse rock for our health :-). But we practiced flash cards tonight just to make sure. We had gone through them a couple times and the card I had up was 8 X 5 and she looks at me and says "oh, these are just halves, so 1/2 of 8 is 4, so the answer is 40" To which I said OK smarty pants if it's that easy then what is 24 X 5, and without blinking she says "120" WHOA, she's scary sometimes.

On top of that they are starting to study state names and she insists that she is going to learn 40 states by Friday. Thankfully we've been working on the states for fun since our trip to Georgia in March. She already knows almost 30 by heart. Just looking at a map she can pull the names out of her head. If I give her the list and have her cross them out as she goes, she can already do more than 40.

I'm so glad she got my smart genes. Although I'm not sure I'm going to like it in a few years when she realizes that she's smarter than I am!

How I'm spending "My" day

Wow, how young AM I in this picture? If you must know, I was 21. (And, yes, I know it's an old grainy picture - lol) Ah, those were the days!

This photo popped to mine after taking myself to the movies today. Princess and I were slackers and stayed on the couch watching movies all morning (my mother's going to KILL me for not being in church, I'm sure!) Princess went to spend a few hours with idiot. I headed to the library to grab a couple things that I needed and then headed to the movie theater to watch United 93.

I can't contribute much to the other reviews that I have seen. It was good. Scary in it's accuracy. Having worked a commercial hijacking when I was on active duty, I can tell you this is exactly what happens. All the direct lines you have don't mean anything when nobody can figure out what's going on. And the movie ends on the note of stating that the military was not even informed that this flight had been hijacked until several minutes after it crashed.

So, back in the day when we had 6 bases under Huntress control sitting alert (and by that I mean, 2 planes sitting, weapons armed, pilots on base, and 2 more planes on standby at each base) would the military have been able to make any impact on the 9/11 situation? I honestly don't think so.

The situation was so unexpected. Controllers couldn't figure out what they were seeing. Rules of Engagement couldn't even be clarified because nobody "in the know" could get the President on the phone. When we sat alert in fear of Russian Bears attacking, things were a little different, but not much. We were prepared for an assault that we understood. Not for terrorism.

And I think the movie portrayed that. There were a couple times when I choked back a few tears - but I wasn't crying. Maybe I was too far into my military hat. I had butterflies in my stomach remembering the days when that was my job.

I have to recommend the movie to everybody though, if you don't go to the theaters, rent it when it comes on DVD. Buy it and show it to your children to remind them when they are teenagers that there are no guarantees in life. That America is a symbol of something so amazing and so great, that the symbols of it's freedom strike fear in those who don't understand it. Those who are so small and scared, those who see that they cannot hold onto their power much longer, those who think that America will somehow be bullied into a corner.......

We come together in the face of fear, we overcome, we fight back

God Bless America

Saturday Six #109

Join me at Patrick's Place to play along!

1. When is the last time you switched from one company to another for an important service? What made you switch? Did the company you were leaving try to make you a better offer to make you stay?
I recently switched from T-Mobile to Nextel for my cell phone service. I had been with T-Mobile for almost 8 years, and things were just getting continually worse from a customer service aspect (gee, that reminds me of AOL for some reason! >giggle<) And no, the rep that I talked to when I called to cancel was one of the rudest I have ever dealt with, and never offered to help or in anyway tried to keep my service.


2. What emblem or logo was on the last coffee mug you drank from?
The last mug I drank tea out of was my big ole Grumpy mug from the Disney Store - it's SO me! LOL

3. On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being a world-class chef and 1 being someone who can't even scramble an egg, how would you rate your cooking ability?
I guess I'd rate myself about a 5. I'm a good cook, when I get around to it. But, I'm not very imaginative and most of the stuff I do cook is standard fare.


4. Take the quiz: Are you a good cook?

You Are a Learning Cook

You've got the makings of an excellent cook, and the desire to be one. But right now, you're just lacking the experience. You couldn't be a top chef yet, but you could be an apprentice.

Are You A Good Cook?

5. When was the last time you prepared a meal for someone other than yourself or those already living with you? Was it well received?
My parents came back from Florida last Saturday night so I cooked a big dinner on Sunday to welcome them home. They loved it (of course!)

6. Since it is that time of year, what show's season finale are you most looking forward to? Which show do you wish would just go away?
I was really looking forward to the end of 7th Heaven - although I have to say I was totally disappointed with the way the "wrapped" it all up. Ah well, maybe the end of West Wing would be better - although I wish they would bring it back next season!

Mother's Day Shmother's day

This time of year stinks. It does. I don't enjoy holidays anymore. Not like I used to. Easter has come and gone and I didn't even decorate. I haven't celebrated Mother's Day since Josh died. Oh we still go over to my mother's house and Princess gives grandma a cute hand crafted card. But that's it for the hoopla. I told them 6 years ago I didn't want anything for Mother's Day (well, nothing they could give me anyway).

I really am not as big of a humbug as it sounds. I don't sit and mope all day (although given the opportunity I would probably enjoy it). I would like to be able to lock myself inside the house all day - heck for weeks prior so that I could avoid seeing all the clueless people going on about their clueless little lives thinking that everything is great. That sounds bitter, doesn't it?

I guess I just hate that I feel this way. I wish I could go back to days when my life was nothing but an uncharted future. But now, too much of my heart is tied to the past.

My classes are keeping me busier than I ever imagined. It's hard to sit in a classroom for 3 hours at a shot and absorb a week's worth of information in one afternoon. I certainly am feeling my age!

I feel like such a mother when I get to class. Yesterday I was sitting there and one of the last girls to come in (mind you this is a Freshman class so these girls are probably not even 20 yet >gasp<) was wearing a white tank top (like men's undershirt style) that was too small for her with a black bra underneath. Since the t-shirt was too small she had rolls of fat hanging out between her shirt and her lowrider jeans. I had this urge to just go over and put my coat on the child! Eek! I hope my daughter knows better than to go out in public looking like that when she goes away to college. On the other hand, maybe I should just be excited that this young lady was even showing up for class, right?

Princess has decided to stay home tonight instead of going to her idiot father's house. Did I mention that he went to the west coast for 9 days and didn't call her once or even bother to send her a postcard? She must have said something to him about it because Tuesday night. After their visit she came home and said "dad said he didn't call me because since I didn't call him he figured I didn't want to talk to him". PLEASE! Just let me smack that man now!

It's feeling like a pizza and a movie night. I could go for a nice cheesy pizza loaded with pepperoni and mushrooms - mmmm, my mouth is watering already!

Back in Class

It felt good to be back in class today. (Even if it was 3 hours and 20 minutes worth!). Today was Psychology of Disabilities. I feel pretty good about choosing this class. The professor is going to be interesting, and I feel like I'm familiar enough with the subject matter to pull out a decent grade. (the good part about being an "old" student? life experience!)

I was reading an article today about the shows that are ending this season. Those of you who know me, can't help but knowing that I am a West Wing nut! At the beginning of this season, I have to say that I was glad they were cancelling. The caliber of shows were not up to their usual standard and each episode just got more disappointing. But, after the last couple episodes I'm dying for them to try and make a go of it! The dynamics between the characters, the laughing, the crying - it's all back! Unfortunately it's back on Sunday night's at 8:00. Which NBC idiot came up with this idea?! Oh sure, let's put one of the only good shows in our lineup against Extreme MakeOver: Home Edition! Let's put it on at 8:00 so Kelly can't watch it because she's busy putting Princess in bed (and therein lies my biggest complaint! lol)

And wasn't NBC the stupid network that decided to piss off half of America by airing a show about a minister and his wacky family? Have they learned nothing from the long running series? West Wing has been on 7 years, 7th Heaven has been on what 9 or 10 years? and how long was Touched by an Angel on? These shows have proved that family friendly drama have a place in programming, so why aren't more production companies and networks embracing them? Are writers just not writing stuff like this anymore?

I certainly don't claim to know. I just wish there were more decent choices out there.

Sunday Seven

Play along at Patrick's Place

THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
Name seven foods in your kitchen (including your refrigerator or freezer) or pantry that you could prepare as a meal in less than ten minutes.

This is sort of a no-brainer, imagine me, single mom, full time college student, sometimes we have less than 10 minutes to make AND eat the meal! lol

1. Stouffer's Frozen Dinners (Grace's favorite is the baked chicken with mashed potatos, mine is the bbq chicken with cheesy potatos)
2. Easy Mac (EWWWW, but hey, the 8 year old loves it)
3. Cheerio's
4. Grilled cheese
5. Tomato Soup
6. Eggs
7. Pizza Rolls (she thinks those are a meal in themselves and gets very angry when I make her have fruit or yogurt along with the nasty pizza rolls!)

I have more, can I list more? ROFL - There's the first 7 I could think of :-)

3 for $1

It's been a couple of lazy days around the house. This means more work for mommy trying to entertain the little one while making her stay on the couch. She was exhausted yesterday so I let her stay home from school. By noon I couldn't take it anymore and we headed out to go see Hoot. I figured at the movie theater there was at least a chance she wouldn't be whining to go outside and play. Both of us really enjoyed the movie. There was only one other person in the whole theater, so it was kinda cool being at a private showing! (Getting there before school gets out made a big difference on opening day :-))

Before the movie we had a few minutes to kill so we went into the local dollar store. She found a bag of punch balls (you know, thick balloons with rubberbands attached to them). Three for a buck - what a deal! We have been playing with them all day. I highly recommend them for releasing all that pent up frustration! Of course, they are cheap, so every once in a while, the end pops open and the whole thing deflates. And then you get to blow it up again. But, what the heck - it's been keeping her entertained for hours. We also picked up a huge bag of Smarties while we were there.....so I'm sort of on a sugar high right now :-)

I did eventually give into the princess last night and let her go to open gym. I figured she had been taking it easy all day and told her she could go with her friend as long as she promised me she would take it easy. They had a really great time, but of course, she woke up with a fever this morning. When will this mommy learn?!! Thankfully after a couple Motrin, she has been back to semi-normal all day.

We are both excited. Grandma & Grandpa should make it back to town before 9 tonight. We have a play to go to (our middle school is putting on a musical). Hopefully by the time we get out of the play, they will be home waiting for us.

I have been a good girl today. While her majesty has been on the couch taking it easy, I have gotten a few of the things off my list done! I feel like I have almost accomplished something (almost being the operative word here).

Classes start on Monday, so I'm trying to juggle the carpool schedule and make sure that everything is set for next week. I can't believe it's time to go back to class already! One of my classes only has 10 people in it; the other one has about 20 - so it should be a nice 6 weeks. This semester I'm taking Psychology of Disabilities and Introduction to Education. Second half of this summer will be Calc 2 and Computers in Education. It's going to be a lot of work, but I'm looking forward to getting it over with. One semester closer to being done!

On a happier note, I forgot to report that they caught the freak that raped the 84 year old woman last week. He says he doesn't remember a thing because he had just been smoking meth (or doing some drug; not sure which it was - and do you think I can find the story on our local news page?!!)

And speaking of local news - 2 thumbs up to the residents who showed up in force at a military funeral yesterday to stand between the family and those freak protesters from Kansas. If God is going to condemn these soldiers for defending such an awful country..... I wonder just what He is going to do to all of THEM for continuing to live here?

Thursday Thirteen

13 Things I Wanted to do This Week
(before her majesty got sick.....)
(also known as mommy whining)

1. Nap (I sort of got a few of those in while princess slept, but I was still in mommy mode, so that's not really sleeping)
2. Take myself to 3 movies (I managed to squeeze in one)
3. Read the Stephen King book my brother got me for my birthday in February (haven't cracked it open)
4. Sort through the pile of crap that has accumulated on my never used dining room table (pile of crap.....still there!)
5. Nap some more
6. Get a couple hanging planters for the front of the house (that's the extent of my gardening skills folks!..... and they're still empty)
7. Work on the template for my journal (and as you can see I haven't touched it)
8. Have lunch with the girls from the doctors office that I was working at (no lunch dates made my organizer this week)
9. Catch up on laundry (are you freakin' kiddin me?)
10. Get all my notes/papers from last semesters classes put in order and filed with the rest of my school stuff (refer back to #4)
11. More napping
12. Get the carpet cleaner from my mom's and get the living room carpet done (I'm laughing so hard now that I just spit pepsi out my nose)
13. Put away the winter clothes and pull the spring/summer clothes to the front of the closet (Guess that'll just happen naturally as I dig for cooler stuff to wear!)

Wanna play along? Visit the home of the Thursday Thirteen :-)

Six Years

At about 9:30 at night on Wednesday May 3, 2000, my beautiful 5 year old son Joshua was declared dead. The doctors and nurses in the ICU stopped trying to resuscitate him, and one of my favorite nurses came out to the nurses station to tell me that he was gone. Since all the rooms were only closed off by glass sliding doors, I had seen their valiant efforts, and there was really no reason to tell me that. No reason, I guess, except for the closure. The "hearing" the words said even when you don't want to hear anything. The brain tumor had finally won the battle.

Thinking about it now, it dawns on me that they hadn't pulled the curtains when they ran the code, and so the entire ICU had front row seats. At that time of the evening though, there were not many people left. Just kids sleeping, many in drug induced stupors.

Funny how I hadn't thought of that before.

I took myself to see "Stick It" today. Figured stupid comedy was just what I needed to take my mind off all that ails me. I managed to laugh a couple times, not sure I would actually advise anybody to go see the movie though! Overall it was pretty bad :-)

Princess tried gymnastics practice after school today. I kept her home from school 'til 10:30 - but she insisted that she wanted to try. They are practing their "routines" (and I use the word loosely) for the spring show, which is on June 1; and of course she did NOT want to miss a practice. She hung in there pretty good overall. Bedtime was a nightmare. She whined about everything, but I figured that would happen as tired as she was.

While mom & dad are still in Florida they are having a tree taken down. When we popped over after gymnastics to get their mail, the tree dudes were there, chain saws in hand and chipper at the ready. They had already brought a good portion of it down. Princess looks at me and says "can we just make sandwiches here and watch them out the kitchen window while we're eating?" What can I say? She's easily amused!

Despite all that, today has been tough. Six years seems so unreal. One of the boys we carpool with is in 5th grade, and I often try to wrap my mind around the fact that my son should be this old. He enjoys picking on princess more than picking on his own sister (perhaps because his sister learned to ignore him years ago? lol). I really have no idea how much my life would be different with two kids.

I just don't have the energy to talk about this anymore tonight. Thank you to all of you for lending me your support today through kind words. I could not ask for a better group of cyber friends :-)

Just Breathe

Somehow I managed to make it through the entire day (up until about 3 minutes ago) without realizing that tomorrow is Wednesday. And not just any Wednesday. May 3 - already! How could it be here already?! I'm aghast at myself for not realizing that it was practically here. I mean, I knew it was coming, but geesh! I'll save that post for tomorrow because there's no reason to make myself cry buckets any more than is necessary :-)

My grades were FINALLY posted today! I just want to go shout to the world:

I GOT a "C" IN CALCULUS....and not even a pesky minus after it, a solid C - woo hoo! I have been dancing all afternoon!

So, for those of us who are keeping tally; it's two A-'s and two C's. Not too bad. GPA is a solid 2.85 (which isn't quite up to my usually oh 3.4ish, and let's not forget my solid 4.0 from last winter! I'm getting that one framed!) I'll take what I can get though, and I am gonna be doing a happy dance well into the night over my big fat C from my stupid Calculus professor!

I was reading over at John's blog (and yes, I still read him, even though he works for the bad company) that half of adults between 18 and 24 can't find Mississippi on a map! Somehow, sadly, this doesn't surprise me. If you want to test your skills, here's a test my daughter loves. And when that gets to easy, go back to the main page and find a harder test! And just so you know - I ROCK at these games, I kick the princess's butt every time we play (LOL - look at me, beating the eight year old!)

On the subject of not knowing where Mississippi is.... I was playing a game online last night, minding my own business. A couple of people were talking in chat so I checked out their profiles (because, yes, I'm nosey darnit all!). One of them has listed UK as the place they come from. The other one has listed Deep in the South as theirs. As the one from the UK says good night, the other one says "hey, were is the UK from the USA?" (meanwhile I'm thinking, is this person SERIOUS?) the answer? "across the ocean" (really, what else was she supposed to say?) So basically we have become a nation that can't find Mississippi and doesn't know where England is on the map?

Where's my "proud to be an American" t-shirt.....maybe i'll start wearing it inside out :-)

Alright already! And the Boycott

All I'm going to say on the subject is that she woke up sick again, and long story short, she DOES have mono >sigh<

I feel like all I've been talking about lately is my sickie little girl! And since it's the big boycott today, I thought I'd take time to vent about that for a minute.

I heard a great analogy once regarding illegal aliens. The speaker said - imagine you are Bill Gates, you have worked hard, you have a huge house, and one day a family of ten just walks into your house and moves in. They're living in a wing of the house that you never use, so they are not in your way. They don't cause any problems, and relatively speaking would be considered good housemates.....except for the fact that they weren't invited!

It made sense to me. And really cuts to the heart of the problem. I don't want to hear "oh, we'll do jobs that nobody else will do". Living in a state that has one of the highest unemployment rates, I'm thinking that if illegal aliens were not doing some of these jobs - owners would figure out a way to employ some of those who are out of work.

And while we're sort of on the subject - let me just go off on a tangent and mention that when I was stationed in Tucson there were stories all over the news about how excited everybody was over the first citizenship ceremony being conducted in Spanish. Really, I wouldn't kid you! People becoming American citizens who don't even want to bother to learn enough of the language to be sworn in as a citizen!

Sometimes I just want to beat my head against a wall.......

And on that note I think I'm done ranting, for a few minutes anyway!