Sunday, April 30, 2006

Still Sick?

Thank goodness for antibiotics right? The miracle drugs of the 20th century. (well, excepting of course all the new germs that are mutating out from underneath them and lurking, waiting to wipe out a tenth of the population in some strange epidemic that we can only imagine is going to hit us soon..... but that's another entry altogether, isn't it?). We went back to the doctor yesterday morning and switched from amoxicillin to keflex and by the end of the day princess was almost back to normal. We took it easy today - although we did sneak out to see The Wild. Not sure I really enjoyed it, but it was nice to get out of the house. Fast forward to about dinner time when the complaints start again. Upset tummy, headache. The doctor told us yesterday that if she was still feeling icky on Monday she would be sending us in to get blood drawn to see if she has Mono. Yes, MONO! who knew an 8 year old could even get mono? When we left the doctor said "See you Monday", so you know she thought right then and there it's probably mono. I guess it could be worse. No yucky medicine. Just try to make the 8 year old take it easy for an entire month. That should be easy.

I guess she could still wake up early tomorrow and feel great. I shouldn't resign myself to the bad news before it happens.

At least I've gotten past the point of sheer panic. It's so easy to get wrapped up in everything that could be wrong. Good to know that my pediatrician is always available to keep me sane :-)

Friday, April 28, 2006

Peaking in my Head

She was home sick again today. I'm in a little bit of panic mode, and I guess in order to properly explain it I need to go back.

On Saturday, April 15, 2000 (see how April 15 fell on a Saturday again this year? Easter was on the 23rd that year though, not the 16th like this year) Anyway, Joshua was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. He spent 2 1/2 weeks in Peds ICU and then he died on Wed May 3. Most of you know all this already, you've heard his story, so I'll spare you the long story..... for now.

The reason I bring this up tonight? Josh had been sick on and off for almost 2 months prior to his diagnosis. But in the last week we were in the ER several times for migraines - all of which had, of course, cleared up by the time we were finally seen. On the morning of April 15, he was miserable, complained that his neck and head hurt and that his tummy hurt. We went to the doctors office where the combination of stiff neck and upset tummy eventually got us a one way ticket to the emergency room with a possible meningitis diagnosis. If only we had been so luck.

So there we are last night, me tucking princess in bed and she says, mommy my neck hurts. I figured she had been laying around all day so of course her neck was going to hurt, she was sick after all. I didn't panic too much, told myself by morning she would be back to normal. Until she came down the stairs and the first word out of her mouth? "mommy my neck REALLY hurts, and my tummy is yucky". Sigh. I promised myself I wouldn't go over the edge. I did not call the doctor. Told myself I'd ride it out. She seemed to feel better by lunchtime, still tired, but not complaining too much. I guess what through me is that it seemed to sort of go in cycles. She's seem to be fine and then sort of double over and whine and whimper (which is SO not like her)....and then about 3 this afternoon, there it came again. Mommy my neck is so stiff it hurts to move and my head feels like it's going to explode. Lovely. Really, really lovely. I called the doctor. The best they could do? If she is still complaining in the morning I need to bring her in. Of course what I'm supposed to do all night while she's sleeping semi-peacefully is another story altogether.

I was proud of myself over all. I only asked her a couple times to turn her head from side to side and lean it back and then down to her chin. Unfortunately every time I did she said it hurt the worst to try to put her chin on her chest - and even then I did NOT rush her to the emergency room. I swear, if I wasn't so worried that she'd wake up in the middle of the night - I'd be drinking right now!

I know it's probably nothing. Probably just achy from the flu and will turn out to be absolutely nothing more. But I can't let it go at that. I don't know what I'll do if she wakes up tomorrow and is still complaining. I foresee a major breakdown on my horizon!

Well, now that it's all out in the open, I almost feel better. So, how about the best "worst" show on TV. If you missed Cheerleader Nation on Lifetime - Shame on you! They followed a varsity cheer team to nationals, and spent time with some of the girls in their homes, talked to their mothers, etc.... It was addicting and so, SO bad! Most of it seemed so fake and staged - but I couldn't help myself - I had to watch it! And, you'll be happy to know, they ended up winning first place at the national high school cheerleading championship. Yes, I'll sentence myself to about 30 hours of discovery channel or A & E to wash the taste of that one out of my mouth :-)

Psychology scores got posted today. I got a solid C overall, so now I'm just waiting on my Calculus grade. I have a feeling I'll be waiting until May 4 when grades are posted through the registrar's office. That's not til next Thursday, in case anybody is counting! Have I mentioned I detest my Calculus prof?!! LOL

Needless to say I didn't make it to see United 93 today. I'm a little bummed, but there is all next week.

I better go take my contacs out - it's gonna be a long, long night

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Home again

Home with a sick princess

As you may have guessed, my day did NOT go as planned. Ah well, the joys of motherhood :-)She woke up this morning saying she had a sore throat and her tummy hurt. I figured she was just trying to get me to let her stay home from school. Then I layed next to her and realized she was practically on fire. She continued to complain that her throat hurt to badly to eat. So, off to the doctors office for a strep swab. Thankfully that was negative, so back home to watch Narnia and try to make it through the day. Nothing like spending a day with moaning and puking to remind you why you became a mother. She managed to get a nap in this afternoon, but she still didn't eat until 6:00 tonight. Once she was finally able to eat, things took a turn for the better, but she was still begging to go to bed before 8:30. Hopefully she will wake up a new girl tomorrow, I have too many things to do!

I did get a pleasant surprise today. Two of my grades got posted. I got my expected A in history, but I got a nice surprising A- in Statistics. Wow! I was shocked! I'm not complaining, because that means if I can pull out a C in Calculus I'll end this awful semester with a 3.0 ish grade point average, which would make me over the moon happy!

On a stranger note, on the news tonight there was a story about an 84 year old woman being raped (by all reports by a man in his mid 20s). I'd really, really, really like to know what kind of sick person would even consider doing something like that? Honestly! How twisted do you need to be to commit rape in the first place but to choose a helpless old woman? It makes me ill just to think about it.

My mom & dad won't be back from Florida for another 10 days. It's been lonely without them around to lean on. Princess is always asking when Grandma is coming home - and today of course the whining consistently included "I want Grandma!" poor thing!

I did decide to try to make it to a movie tomorrow - I think it's going to be United 93. This, of course, all depending on her majesty waking up in a good mood and going to school. Otherwise I'm stuck here again, just me, the sick kid and the internet. What more does a girl need?

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Hitting the Wall

Sheer exhaustion has finally set in. I promised myself I would turn in early tonight, I am SO tired. Exams are done. My history exam this morning was great, she even gave us extra credit (15 points) which she said she would give us full credit for no matter what we wrote down, as long as we wrote something! How fun is that?! I wish I knew what to say about my psychology exam. I got another C >harumpf< I thought this test was easier than the last 2.....

But let me go back. I set up my classes so that they would all be in the same building. About the second week of the semester I got really sick, bronchitis sick, hard to walk and breath at the same time. I missed almost 2 weeks of school. Well, during this time my psych professor moved our class to another building. So that even when I did go back to class, his class was still too far to get to (since it was right smack in the middle of my day!). Not a major problem, I kept up on the reading and according to his syllabus we would be graded on 3 50 question multiple choice tests. When the first test came, I got a C. No problem I thought - I missed so many classes, a C is to be expected. Between the 1st and the 2nd tests I only missed one class. Took the 2nd test and thought it was really hard! So, I was happy with my 2nd C, but a little disheartened - since I got the same test score whether I went to class or not. Since the last test I missed 2 classes. Went, took the final today (which was not cummulative) and thought it was really easy. But I got a C on this one too! I am so bummed, but in the long run, it's not in my major and it's a passing grade so I shouldn't complain too loudly.

I did get an unexpected surprise this afternoon. I went to log into my grades to see how I did on that psych test and lo and behold there is a "new" class listed on my class list. It was titled Junior Year Writing waiver. The University I attend requires you to take a writing class in your freshman year, and then again in your junior year. It seems, that without my knowing about it, my professor was participating in a "pilot" program. The junior year writing requirement can either be met by taking the class for a semester or testing out of it. The history class I took was also considered a "writing" class, where 50% of the grade was based on papers that you had to write. Starting next year, these teachers will be able to grant you a waiver for your junior year writing if your papers are good enough. But, since we were involved in the "pilot" program some of us got our waivers early!! I am just so excited. I was dreading having to find time to go take this test! And now I don't have too - yeah me!

Now that exams are over, be warned, next week is Josh's 6th glory day (sounds so much nicer than saying the anniversary of his death) so expect entries over the next few days to turn gray and mucky. I haven't had time to really deal with it these past few weeks. His birthday flew by without much time for a serious breakdown, so I have a few stored up. If you're in a particularly good mood, you may want to avoid me for a few days :-)

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

2 down

Ah, I feel temporarily free. Which basically means i have 1/2 an hour to myself before I have to fetch Princess from school, amuse her 'til bedtime and then when she gets to bed it's back to studying for tomorrow's exams.

Today's first exam was Statistics - it was OK, i forgot several things (despite being allowed to bring cheat sheets (how dumb am i?)) but overall I think I pulled off a C, so my grade for that class should hang in the Bish category. Then there was Calculus. Grrr - that was hard! this woman gives us a review sheet last Wed and gives us 2 hours in class to work on it in groups, then you get to the exam today and only about 1/2 of the exam is stuff that was on the review sheet - WTF?! I still think I did OK, there was one 10 point question that I am sure I didn't get full marks on, and probably enough little mistakes that I'll have a B- or C+ on the test, so I think I can do a little "can't touch this" dance and celebrate passing Calculus! woo hoo!

(By way of my parents insurance agent) I was browsing a web-site where you can order medication through a company out of India (doesn't that just sound safe? >insert sarcasm here<) While I was looking at some of the medications I take, I looked at the oral contraceptives. I'll be ordering some from them in the next few days. Curiosity has gotten the best of me! You can get a pack for $3.09 (plus shipping of course) but get this, the packs are packs of TWENTY! Um, do they know something that I don't about women? 20 pills?! Just how exactly does that work?? I'll have to give you all a full report after I find out. I'm tempted to call the consumer reporter at our local TV station and have them take some drugs to a lab to get them analyzed. See if they even are close to what they say they are. For all I know they'll be sellin me sugar pills >giggle<

It is a crappy, cold, overcast day here. Princess insisted on wearing her flip-flops to school. Being the good mommy that I am, I let her freeze her toes off and told her she HAD to take her sneakers & socks in her backpack and if the sun didn't come out she couldn't go out for recess without putting them on. That's where I'm lucky. I know that even though she is at school, and I'm not there, she will put the shoes on at lunch time. Of course, when she gets out of school here shortly, I am sure I will have to hear about all the other girls who had sandals on and how they weren't "that cold" and why can't she just where hers. She definately gets the whining gene from me!

I'm looking forward to finishing my exams tomorrow and then doing absolutely nothing on Thursday, maybe I'll take myself to a movie while her majesty is in school. I've heard "Thank You for Smoking" is worth seeing (albeit this opinion came from young, young college students, but I may give it a shot anyway). Who really cares what you're watching as long as you have the gallon of pepsi and the popcorn with butter flavored toping :-)

Monday, April 24, 2006

Turning a Page

This semester has been tough, and from the lecture my academic advisor gave me I'm guessing next fall isn't going to be any prettier. For the most part my classes have been interesting, my teachers (with one exception) enjoyable to listen to. Here's how things stack up. I start my day out with Intro to Statistics, which is sort of required by way of being a prereq for a class I have to take for my major AND my minor. After that, two hours of Calculus I, Derivatives, which being a math major you can guess is definately required. Next up, Cross-Cultural Psychology, required for my minor. And rounding out my day is History of Medicine and Health. They're all tough classes. My statistics teacher is fabulous, and lets us bring our notes into tests, but I always seem to make enough little mistakes to end up with a B, so I'm guessing I'll get a B in her class. My psych prof is SO amazing, he loves the subject and has really gotten us involved in a lot of great discussions in class. Unfortunately, his tests have been hard to predict and I'm expecting a C in his class....maybe a B- if I'm really, really lucky! History of Medicine, another really interesting subject. My prof there, too, is really smart and she loves the subject matter. It's also a writing course, so I have a good chance of pulling off a B+ from her, and if I'm really good on the final I can pull of an A- (yippee!). Now, for the downer. My calculus prof should have definately chosen another profession. Although, she hasn't spoken to the point specifically, I do believe this is her first semester teaching - and let me just say - it shows! But, better than that I have a required class that I have to take winter semester next year and she is the only one teaching it! How sad am I? If I can pull off a B on the final I might be able to squeek out a C in this class, but at this point I'm setting the bar low - 63 is all I need for a passing grade, so I'll be happy as long as I don't have to take it again!

I have to take 4 classes over the summer to catch up with my curriculum. One of them I can take online, but I also have to take Calc 2, Integrating - and for the summer semester that means taking it twice as fast. I barely survived Calc 1 at the regular pace, so I hope I at least have a decent teacher for the next one.

I had spring break WAY back at the beginning of March and I took princess down to Atlanta for a few days. We went to opening weekend at Six Flags Atlanta and we rode roller coasters until I wanted to puke. It was a perfect day! We also went to their new aquarium, which princess wasn't too thrilled with and took the World of Coke tour. Let's just say we might as well only have gone to Six Flags, because that was ALL she talked about on the ride home. I kept her out of school for a week, and she made sure to tell all her friends that she was getting TWO spring breaks this year. She had her spring break the first week in April and my dad took her to Mammoth Caves. They had fun (despite her 24 hour stomach flu, puking 3 times in the hotel bed and my dad panicking and taking her to the ER!). She's going to be spending a lot of time with Grandma & Grandpa this summer while I'm in class. I just have THE best parents. They have stood by me helping out financially and always being available to take care of Grace. And Grace loves spending time with them. Heck, I do too, they afe fun people!

I'm sure there are a few more things that happened over the last five months. Oh, I sidelined Mr. Right Now. Semi-permanently I think. Part of it my lack of time, and part of it his inability to stand up for what is best for his boys. He's too afraid to make waves with his parents and his ex - even though he KNOWS what's going on is only making a bad situation worse for his young sons. Aside from his lack of backbone he's a great guy. I'm sure there is some control freak out there who will make him a decent girlfriend :-)

Hmmm, what else am I forgetting? I think those are the hilights for now, anyway.

This week I have 2 exams Tues and 2 exams Wed. On top of that we have Social Studies fair Tues night (last year it was science fair) and princess made a covered wagon. It turned out really good - and I hardly had to do any of the work! I'll have to remember to take a picture so you can see how cute it is.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

If I'm going to do this

If I'm coming back; I'm diving in head first, back to posting, back to participating in my favorite blogger challenges. Starting with the master

It's the
Saturday Six (ya gotta love Patrick!)

So, here we go! It's easy, go visit Patrick and answer the six questions, then run back to his blog and post a link. You'll be amazed what you can find out about your friends.

1. What food do you most enjoy cooking? How many people have you cooked this dish for?
My favorite thing to cook has got to be a pot roast, because it tastes so good and it's so easy to make! Most of the time I just throw it in the crockpot and let it go :-) How many people have I cooked for? Geesh, I'm not much of an entertainer so I would have to guess the most I ever cooked for is 8 ('cause that's all the chairs I have - lol)

2. If you could go behind the scenes at any television show to get a look at how things worked, which show would you choose and why?
Hmmmm, that's a tough one. How about America's Most Wanted! See how they decide who to profile and watch the entired process at work.

3. Besides your bed, what's the easiest place in your home for you to take a nap? When was the last time you fell asleep there?
Sadly, that's usually the floor. If I can convince princess to watch a movie, i usually stretch out on the floor with a pillow and >bam!<>

4. Take the quiz: What time of day are you? (Found at Shelly's Cyber Chocolate

You Are Sunrise

You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary.

You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward.

Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts.

All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be.

Not sure what that's about...if I was ever up early enough to see a sunrise, I'd be in such a bad mood nobody would want me around!

5. What time of year do you usually read the most books?
I read all the time, but I guess during the summer we are outside more so I don't read as much. Making winter the time I read most books.

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #89 from Jamilynn: What is your favorite article of clothing? Is there a story behind it?
My favorite favorite thing to wear is a bright pink sweatshirt that I used fabric paint on. I have both of my kids handprint's and their names on it. It's now 8 years old, so I don't wear it "out" very often, but for bumming around the house you will seldom find me wearing anything else.

Playing Catch Up

I've been surfing, trying to read the last post or two in journals that I haven't been to in months. I had forgotten how many great people I have been missing.

Today was a good day. Spring is here, and I am almost feeling human for the first time in ages. Princess is gone camping until tomorrow with her idiot father. I needed the break. It's been too long since I have had an opportunity to do absolutely nothing.

I'm putting school on the back burner for the day. I'm not going to even crack a book. My first exam isn't until Tuesday, so I'll have some time tomorrow before her majesty gets back from camping. And then during the day Monday she'll be at school, which means more study time.

There was a hysterical story on the news last night.
Petition to lower gas prices The governor seems to think that the president should be working to cap the amount of profit that "big oil" is making from gas. As the governor of Michigan, shouldn't she be more worried about, oh I don't know, perhaps the Big 3 auto makers. You know, the companies that don't seem to want to put anything gas efficient on the market, don't want to transition over to making hybrid vehicles that are better for the environment and would, to a small extent, help lessen our need for foreign oil. The auto companies, who unlike the oil industry, can't pay their taxes or their employees!!! As the governor of Michigan, isn't that what SHE should be worried about? Making industy that can compete on a global market. Industries that don't destroy the great lakes that surround our beautiful state?

Silly me for thinking politics has gotten out of hand?!

Ah well, it feels good to put my thoughts back out there into the great unknown of cyberspace. I'm starting to feel better already.

Friday, April 21, 2006


I think I might be back; I'm still undecided on this point. I need to purge, to vent, but honestly - when is there time?!! Last time I posted was right before Christmas, and gosh is that the last time I had a chance to come up for air? I think it is! My classes this semester aren't bad overall. My grades leave a little to be desired; but that I'll save for a later post.
......So where is my life? Only a few more weeks and it will be 6 years since Josh died. My princess is turning into this fabulous young lady; I am more proud of her every day. Exams are next week and my parents have deserted me for 2 weeks and run off to Florida. What I wouldn't give to be with them! Although it was 73 here today and they said it was 94 there - so who's laughing now?!

And completely off topic (see, if I pretend I have a topic I'll fool everybody out there) the Miss USA pageant is on. I really just don't get the whole beauty pageant thing. Maybe I'd feel differently if I looked like these girls. I guess if you can pay for your student loans by parading around in a bathing suit, maybe it's not bad work if you can find it?!

And on that note, that's as far as I'm sticking my toes back in the water for now. I may even play around with the site for a while this weekend and make it look purdy - heck I may even go and visit other sites and catch up on my friend's lives....who knows! (Anything to avoid studying for exams >giggle<)